2 heads are better than 1.

1, or one, or OMG! IM ONE!!, or maybe even einer, is the first number of the alphabet. It is how many US dollars you have in your retirement right now. Keep working and you may have 2, by the time you're retired (maybe, if you're lucky). It's how many numbers you can count up to.

It's also how many girlfriends you have, and it's really boring if you only have one.

History Edit

No one knows (or cares) what the number 1 originated from, except the geeky Scientists who think they'll make a quick buck by figuring that out, so they spend the next 20 years analyzing crap that the Mayans probably made up when they were drunk and/or high (at the same time) off of Coca-Cola and Smarties.

In 1972, professor Jumbo Jimbo, whose middle name was surprisingly Jambo, said, "I propose to give a speech that will annihilate your performance in standards of mankind in the trajectory of the number one. I have no idea what I just said."

Everyone knew he had no idea what he just said. His words are a theory of what may have killed the dinosaurs (back in 1972, you know, the Stone Age?).

#1 Edit

It is considered good to be #1 at something, especially like "The Biggest Loser", which parodies "The Biggest Weight Loser" by picking people who lose races and events/sports, and then they give them a "chance" to compete against other losers, and hopefully they will be able to determine the biggest loser out of the 14 sorry losers that already have been determined by mediocre sports like softball and tennis.

On the radio, a song being #1 (i.e. the gay song Poker Face, by Lady GayGay HomosexualHomosexual Gaga) is a good thing, and it is determined by if people like it or not. This seems to be a poor judgement of people, however, because most of them who listen to music are teenagers (as adults who listen to "music" tend to be created before the teenagers were born, and the adults don't like change, so they are blinded by bad songs) and they pick songs that will be overplayed on the radio, for the next 3 months or so.

There are some lame songs like Just Dance that were released a year ago and are still popular. It is because people who like dance music dance to it. A lot. A whole lot. Even though I don't consider it a good dance song, because people will have trouble trying to decide a dance for it, because one shouldn't exist. At All. A whole all.

See also Edit

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