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Bird

A bird, currently watching a human. Planning. Plotting.

Birds, of whom got their name from the word terd, are animals who can fly up in the air, often making them intoxicated by the wind (by getting high off of it).

For the most part, birds are small, but some are larger than others. Big bird, fof of Sesame Street, was pretty big. Others, however, such as the chipmunk bird, are small, and vulnerable to danger and nature.

Despite popular belief, the white stuff that comes from the sky is not vanilla ice cream, so don't let your child believe that it is. The cream, even though considered tasty to those without taste, has a bad aftertaste, much like broccoli. This will cause your stomach to not be able to digest it, and you will die.

Birds have the ability to carry small pistols, and they also know how to use them, as they went to Medical school a little after college before they decided to hunt down animals like lions and humans.

History Edit

Birds have been around since humans have, just about it, and birds were jealous that humans were bigger and could talk, so they decided to invent something called a "machine gun" and decided to use it agaist humans. This prompted the Bird vs. Human War that started back in the 1900s.

Even though it is unclear on who won that battle, as humans did not know a battle was going on, no one was harmed in it, with the exception of a bird accidentally walking in front of a car and dying. This would get the birds even angrier.

Birds and humans are now on good terms, but birds are known to spy on humans in places like public parks and outside their window, to figure out a masterplan to destroy all human life as they know it.

Nature Edit

Birds are known to be friendly with everyone but humans, but they are sometimes even a little aggressive with other species, too. Once, a bird wrestled a dog and when the final round was on, it took out a pistol and shot the dog in the head, causing the dog to die. The bird is now serving 20 years in jail, despite police officers knowing how easily the bird could fly out the barred window of his jail cell.

Birds are also under scientific study at this very moment, and it is unknown whether birds have three toes on their feet, or more, because as scientists proved with numbers (back in 1944), scientists don't know how to count.

See also Edit

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