Coca-Cola

File:Coke.jpg AAAHHH YEAAHH. Coca Cola, often pronounced Cock-ee-Call-uh, is a caffiene-producing company that ensures that your drink is unhealthy as possible, but tastes remotely okay, so you'll want more overall. Coca Cola exists as a factory created in, no, not Brazil (yeah right) but in America (of course). It makes Coccaine, too, because it feels that since Coca Cola used to be Coccaine, it should continue to secretly enhance Coca Cola's flavor with the use of Coccaine. And you'll know if Coccaine has affected you if you go to the bathroom within the next 24 hours after you drink Coke. Three Forms Coca Cola exists in different states of matter: a cube, also known as the C-cube, is a competitor of the Rubik's Cube, and gains a lot of attention from being completely edible, versus the Rubik's Cube which is only semi-edible. Another form is, of course, the drink, Coca Cola, which is, of course, probably the worst tasting and worst selling version of Coca Cola there is yet. The third form is known as "Air-Coke" for it is highly toxic and exists in the air, and it makes the victim sneeze, cough, and develop the common cold, which is an incurable serious medical problem. History Cockee Cocka The man who invented Coca Cola is known as 'Santa Cola', and his middle name, which is unimportant anyways, is not known by anyone, not even his family. The man, born in 1945, developed Coke when he was in his 50's, around 2001, when his business company finally had enough money to have all the ingredients to make it with. When they did create it, it was called, "Cockee Cocka" but when kids drank it and read the name, they were forced to change it to something else, so they had to even re-enhance the ingredients to make it taste better and to take the "Coccaine" part out of it, but they lied about it and it's still in there to this very day. Rival Against Pepsi File:Pep.jpg The truth When they developed their logo in 2004, the producers of the company brand name were now earning millions, versus Pepsi who were earning millions and ones, so they had to beat Pepsi out, and they resorted to destroying their factory. This age of fighting, during 2005-2008, was known as the CP Rival Against Pepsi Age, and named Coca Cola Rival because they were always jealous of more successful companies. When the Stock Market blew up in late 2008, this marked the end of the CP Rival Against Pepsi Age. See also Coke Zero Earth The world The modern world