The English language derived from rats, and they got jealous of humans being 100,000,000x smarter than them so they developed their own language, which is a bunch of "shsh" and "pssht".
Your language arts teacher will probably try and tell you that your "dialect" or whatever is wrong, but she/he's wrong, not you.
Don't worry about it.
The history of English dates all the way back to 2006, when the Britain language was new.
Ha. Just kidding. Why would anyone criticize English? That's right, nobody would, and nobody could, even if they wanted to. There's not enough things about it to critique it. And stuff. Yeah. So critics can only say good stuff about it, and only good stuff. In fact, one critic
who was held at gunpoint said, "I love English so much that I want to marry it and have kids with it."
Now isn't that just lovely?