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grass

Grass is two things: it can be the stuff that drug dealers grow in their yard, or it can be the stuff that is legal and you grow in your yard.

Grass that is legal is usually mowed with a lawnmower, but lawnmowers can be used as weapons, too, so don't get caught using one. It is known that lawnmowers are loud, too, so take a stereo outside and sit it in your driveway, then turn it up to full volume so it will drown out the sound. As simple as that.

For the illegal grass, use a large trashbag to cover your entire lawn so that no one notices it. If someone asks why you have trashbags laying all over your lawn, tell them it's simply one of your cultures, and that it's a tradition to cover your lawn with trashbags.

History Edit

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What happened in the 1600s

Back in the olden times, when lawnmowers weren't invented yet, some people ask how the people back then mowed grass (without a lawnmower).

Well, if they didn't have any animals to eat it, they would cover it in gasoline and burn it (light a match). That would take care of the problem %100 of the time. However, problems occured when this happened. Sometimes, if someone (a hobo from New York or something) had been sleeping in the lawn, and you pour him all over with gasoline by accident, he will burn to death, and your house can catch on fire very easily trying that method.

So what people did was started using a machedi to "mow" the grass down. This would cause the grass to be uneven, however, and it was hard work, so eventually, one guy named "Push Mower" invented this thing he called a "crab", which would mow the grass with an automatic blade and would be a lot easier. You just had to push it.

Eventually, people decided to name it "Lawnmower" because of Mower's name, and also because it mowed their lawns. This solved problems up until Americans were invented, and so they needed an easier way to do this.

Thus, the riding lawnmower and push lawnmower was invented. This solved a lot of problems, but people prefer for robots to do the job so they invented those. Only for mowing lawns, of course.

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