If there's something that sucks so hard that it doesn't even qualify as a game system, it's the Wii.
Your everyday sucksystem, it is played by 3 year olds who lose interest pretty easily in its complicated methods of persuading others to use it (that don't work very well).Yeah, it sucks.This object of dissatisfaction offers little stimulation for those who want it. Their best game, with graphics of about 1 out of 10, would probably be one of the Call of Duty games. Players have to tolerate the poor quality and stupid control mechanisms so they can play. Wiis are dropping in price now because they suck and no one's buying them. They won't even take them if they were free.
Wii's were invented by the intoxicated Nintendo, a former drug dealing team who used to make drugs who now makes video-games. They would've continued making drugs, but they were caught in the act and were sentenced to life in prison unless they stopped dealing drugs (drug dealing).
The original name of the sucksystem was JohnJohn's Ferrari, but it was later changed due to the fact that it wasn't selling very well.
The Wii opened in the markets on July 4th, 1903, but only about 4 copies were sold between that time and 2007. Then, when a man named Wii Suck changed the name of the system to Wii, in honor of him, and people started buying it for no reason whatsoever.
As of 2009, the Wii has sold over 10 copies worldwide.
Physical Properties Edit
The Wii is shaped like a box (how original, right?) and comes in three different colors: Birdpoop white, Humanpoop brown, and Squirrellpoop green.
It comes with a controller, too, which has the same shades of colors available, too. The shape of the controller models the shape of George Bush's face, as they share a close resemblence. This has added to the controversy of the sucksystem.
George Bush's Face Edit
When the Wii debuted in 1903, the 59 year old George Bush sued Nintendo for perjury.
After he won, Nintendo was forced to pay him 5 billion dollars.
In the Wii system, found in late 2008, it was discovered that Nintendo had been hiding drugs in the sucksystems, which caused players to become addicted to them. Ever since the government made Nintendo remove the drugs, not one person has bought another copy since.